In real talk

Real Talk: I'm in a Long Distance Relationship


Hey guys! This is my Real Talk series where I interview real people about their experiences and situations. Today I'm talking with Melissa from Elephant on the Road. She's a 23-year-old graduate who's in a (very) long distance relationship. She lives in Santiago de Chile and her boyfriend, Keith, lives in Miami Florida.  

1. How did you and your boyfriend meet, when did y'all start dating?
Keith and I met in 2015 while I was studying abroad for one semester in Montclair State University. He was living in the apartment downstairs mine and was having a party one night. One of my roommates was there, so she invited me (like… who needs an invitation from the actual host to a college party lol). I went there to check out how was everything, when I noticed she was talking to a really hot guy. I had a crush on him the first moment I saw Keith. 

We connected easily and right away. That night he made sure to have me in all his social media. And since that day we never stopped talking. We started dating more seriously at the end of the semester. And of course it was a few days before I had to come back to Chile. Talk about bad timing.

2. Why are you and your boyfriend doing long distance? How often do you get to travel to see him or vice verse?
We fell in love really fast and we knew the relationship had good potential (and we weren’t wrong!). So we decided to start a long distance relationship days after I was again in Chile. 

Chile is in South America. Kinda, the last country in the continent. So the distance is a lot. From Santiago to Miami, there are 8 hours in a plane. That also means more expensive tickets. 

Since I got back from studying abroad. I’ve seen him 6 times during these two years. Like every 4 months or so. I know… not so much. And honestly, I had the idea it was more. I normally travel to the US and we make arrangements to be in Miami or Myrtle Beach. Last year he came to my birthday in October and it was the best present he could give me.

3. What were some of your initial thoughts or fears starting long distance?
Some of the fears I had were related to him meeting new girls who could be better (and closer) to him. Also, about traveling. Plane tickets are not cheap, so we were scared to not see each other at all. These thoughts still scare me, but way less than before. 

4. What are some ways you stay close to your BF even though he's far away?
Video chatting!! That’s the number one way that helps me to feel closer to him. We send each other videos too or voice recordings. Anything that is not a text. Get to hear his voice and see him is the best. Also, I have some of his clothes, hoodies and a sweatpant. I wear them all the time and it makes me feel closer to him for sure. 

5. Do you have any worries for when you aren't able to be closer together?
Right now, we don’t know when the next time we see each other will be. That’s what worry us the most. The not knowing is the worst. Things get better every time we buy the tickets. Because we can manage better our feeling and we look up to something fun. We make plans for dates or adventures, like going together to other cities. And in general, we get exited! 

6. How do y'all handle special events or days that you can't travel to see each other?
This Saturday is our anniversary. Two years together. We won’t be together but we manage to make it special anyways. We know is a special day so we treat it like that. It’s not only a sad day because we aren’t together. But also a happy day because we have been fighting the distance and we have made it until here.

Every special events or days; like Christmas, Valentine’s Day or New Years Eve. We video chat. It’s our best and only way to talk. We try not to be sad about not sharing those days together. I always tell Keith that someday (soon) we will be together every festivity. 

7. What tips do you have for people who are in a long distance relationship?
Be strong and love harder when things get difficult. Keith and I have been in really bad situations were we thought that was the end. But those moments you fight them with love and understanding. You can’t be selfish or proud.

It won’t be easy, but at a certain moment you will learn how to deal with that in a better way. When you love that person and you have a future together, you fight for that. At the end it’s worth it. 

8. What do you want people who aren't in long distance relationships to know?

Being in a long distance relationship doesn’t mean you get a free pass on everything. Or that the is an open relationship, or that he/she won’t know if you do something wrong. This kind of relationship is about trust and love. It’s about two people together trying to beat the distance the best way they can. If you have a friend who is in one don’t tell them they are boring if they don’t want to go to a party or a certain event. Behind that decision is something more.

People need to understand is really hard to be in a long distance relationship and they really love the person who is far away. Don’t questions their decision. If you don't get it, it’s fine. Some people need to be close to their significant other all the time. And that’s good too.

Melissa is the author of the lifestyle blog Elephant on the Road, and is from Santiago de Chile. Connect with her on the platforms below.
 


Related Articles

8 comments:

  1. Thanks for the opportunity Hannah! I enjoyed answering the questions <3

    xx, Melissa
    https://elephantontheroad.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sure thing! Feel free to guest post any time ;)

      Delete
    2. I follow Melissa's blog! Love this collaboration! :)

      Allie
      www.champagne-tuesdays.com

      Delete
  2. Gosh that must be so hard! My now husband and I managed a long distance relationship for a while - just an hour or so away and we found it difficult so it must be extremely difficult to be a plane ride away x

    LuxeStyle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know right, I'm glad they're able to make it work!

      Delete
  3. Such a great insight into what it is like to be in a long distance relationship. It sounds so difficult but so sweet that they love each other enough to work through it.

    Jennifer | Classy in CA

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know I've never had to do long distance but I realize how hard it must be. Thanks for the comment!

      Delete
  4. I love this collaboration! I think it's so great that you guys put in so much effort & dedication to make the long distance work. I really struggle with distance; my BF was visiting home overseas pretty early on in our relationship, and I just missed his voice so much! I got him to send me voice recordings, haha

    ReplyDelete